Category Archives: Positive thinking

What I could call this ‘living in the jungle’ experience?

I’m struggling to match my thoughts with my emotions. It seems that the past few months of this whirlwind event-chain has now calmed down and it’s trying to find a place to rest. And that place is seeking a title, a name, a short description. I don’t know which shelf to put it on, it needs a whole new cupboard, a whole new room actually. These past 8 months have been incredibly life shaping for me. Especially the second half of this period was what drove me forward before it broke me down and shattered me to pieces. I needed to hit ground zero to realise what it is that I truly wanted in life. I got exactly what I asked for and what I wanted to experience. Yet when I think back I’m struggling to accurately express what I just went through emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

I ran away from success to be in uncertainty and ended up living in the middle of the jungle in Sri Lanka with a man who used to serve in the French legion and woke up each morning to the sound of monkeys jumping on our roof.

Bizarre. This word doesn’t even come close to describing those months. Did I have an amazing experience? For sure. Was I really happy? Definitely not. It was a time of transformation and inner work. Real self-development doesn’t come with smiling faces and constant bliss. It means digging deep within yourself, finding your hidden fears and your buried ‘whys’ for your emotional reactions. And when you find them, you have the choice to either look them in the eye and go straight into those fears or you can find another excuse to quietly cover them up with something else to keep peace. You can easily guess which option I chose. So I shattered myself in the middle of the jungle. Looking back, I believe it was a good environment to carry out this exercise, even though it didn’t always feel that way. Whilst there, I felt that I disconnected from myself, that I lost my way somehow while all I wanted to do was to find my real path. Oh, the irony. Life truly has a great sense of humour.

8 months of searching and realigning. Once my mind had an ‘upgrade’ it only took me 1 week to shift gears and change directions. I knew it was the start of a new chapter which meant closing down old patterns and making space for new beginnings. I re-evaluated my principles and priorities. I came up with new goals and visions, but most of all I felt that I came back to myself as an improved version of me.

So even though I’m still struggling to match my thoughts with my emotions I’m certain that this is the aftermath of this significant experience I just went through. Just as the whole journey didn’t make sense while I was experiencing it and the full picture cleared out once I closed down the chapter, it is very likely that my current emotional state will make sense to me a little bit later. And with that thought I put my mind at rest and will stop thinking about what I could call this.

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This is a snippet from my upcoming book: All roads lead to Ohm.
I aim to inspire others by sharing not only my eventful stories but life experiences of real characters whom agreed to share the raw, unedited truth.

Still shedding

03/12/2018

How do we realise that we’re going through a changing process? When does it switch on in our mind that this is it, something going on right now? Until this moment, I never managed to grab onto the process and consciously enjoy the ride. I only noticed the changes within me after they took place and settled. But right now, I’m fully aware of the fact that something deep within me is turning. Like an ancient wooden wheel being steered into a different angle. It’s not a smooth movement. It’s making a crackling sound, gets stiff every now and then and it needs a harder push to change its position.

I believe in something, I speak it as my truth, yet I have an internal battle when it comes to action time. I’m shedding my old skin, the very same skin I firmly believed I shed already. Yet it’s still stuck on me. Ripping it off bit by bit is a painful process but it needs to be done. What’s emerging underneath is still unknown to me. Endless number of questions are swirling inside my head, around my soul and within my heart. How do I bring them into one clear focus point? I’m not sure. I just have to trust the process. To know, deep within, that the answers will arrive I’m ready, when I need them. Until then I let go of doubts and fear. I go straight through this terrifying experience and embrace the uncertainty. I feel that I started walking my true path even though I don’t see the road yet.

It’s time

11/12/2018

Extending our 24-hour time restricted day…

So many people say ‘I don’t have time for that’. And it has been said numerous times before me that we have time for what we make time for. But. What if some of us don’t have the basic required means to do what we really would like to do? And I’m not talking about luxury experiences here. Taking a day off to relax our mind might not be possible for someone who works 7 days a week in an undeveloped country for such a low wage that is barely enough to cover survival needs. Going for dinner in a restaurant? Out of the question for these people. Yet they have such strength and calmness. They do not worry what tomorrow will bring because they only enjoy the present day. They’re grateful to experience today. Then another today and another until years have passed. These kind of people are scared to dream.

How can they develop an ambitious mindset when they don’t see any opportunities getting lost when suddenly coming their way? These people truly embrace every 24-hour, every moment, every millisecond. They cherish life. Their 24-hour feels longer. No, not because they are suffering, not at all. These people might live in poverty or a near poverty environment, yet they are happy. They appreciate the smallest things that most of us walk by. A genuine smile, the taste of ripe fruit, the smooth breeze on our skins, an honest conversation. Being fully present and fully experiencing every moment what extends their 24-hours.

2018: the year of transformation

2018 has been the most eventful year so far that shaped me on so many levels. As I rewind the events in my mind I wonder how I managed to push myself through all these experiences with a genuine smile on my face. This year has definitely been a wild ride and I’m so grateful for its teachings. All that happened made me shed my skin and made me reborn time after time. Just when I thought my transformation has fully completed another layer of old skin emerged ready for shredding. I learnt to detach, to let go, to allow life to flow, to trust my intuition, to believe in myself. I taught others to love themselves, to dare to follow their dreams and to be courageous to jump into new experiences. And by others I also mean the other side of myself.

I started the year by facing my true feelings and allowing them to come to the surface. Acknowledge, observe then release and let go. I let go of connections, situations, ideas and created space for new meaningful opportunities.

I turned within to align myself.

I faced my fears and dealt with unresolved issues which were rooted so deep that it took multiple attempts to shovel them up. Went through the darkest days to arrive at the brighter side of my life. I learnt that real self-work is not all about smiles. This part of my development journey was the most painful one yet it brought the most positive results with it.

I cut myself free from negative vibes and removed myself from situations that I no longer resonated with. I made a conscious decision that from now on I will not settle for anything less than authentic happiness. All or nothing. No illusions, no games, no masks, no pretense. If I can’t be my true self then that situation or connection doesn’t belong to my path.

I followed my dreams. I travelled.

Travelled to expand my mind. I visited 22 cities in 9 countries. Can’t even count how many beautiful souls I met along these trips who opened my eyes and shared their ideas and life stories with me. I smiled, cried, laughed, hugged when I felt like. I was in awe, I was curious, experienced childish joy, felt the pain of others but most importantly I wore my true self as my costume.

I spent more time with my family and friends, created moments together that filled my soul with love and gratitude. I loved deeply and received so much pure love that I will be ever so grateful for.

Wonderful people kept on turning up in my life. As if they were orchestrated to pop up along my journey. I received wisdom, healing, knowledge, power, understanding and guidance from them. Self-mirroring individuals kept on shining their light into my soul. My connections with my existing tribe became concrete strong.

2018 has been the most eventful year so far because I took action.

I went straight into new experiences.

Got lost in forests multiple times.
Drove a quad bike.
Saw wild elephants.
Met with starseeds.
Stared at the Moon way too many times.
Witnessed countless mesmerising sunsets.
Shared magical moments with a warrior.
Played with energy.
Drove a speed boat and broke down in the middle of sea.
Meditated with a monk in the mountains.
Quit my job.
Closed off a big chapter in my life.
Canoed in a lagoon.
Left the country I called home to move into uncertainty.
Had precognitive dreams.
Enjoyed delicious food.
Volunteered whenever I could.

It is vital to also recognise some of the things I DIDN’T do that helped me become a better person:

Didn’t cause harm with the information I know.
Didn’t manipulate others even when I had the chance.
Didn’t play tactical games even though it resulted in a disadvantage for me financially.
Didn’t expect others to create my own happiness.
Didn’t allow my ego to sabotage my inner guidance.
Didn’t promise anything I knew I couldn’t keep.

This has definitely been an incredibly transformational year. My biggest lesson in 2018 was something quite simple though.

I realised that true love doesn’t need to be defined and categorised. Love has so many variations, layers and forms. It has the power to turn someone’s day around, to turn someone’s life around. Generating from self love we can brighten up this world with all kinds of love. I realised that spreading kindness within humanity is the most beautiful type of love.

A couple of years ago I wrote down what my ultimate goal is in my life:

to bring more smiles into this world.

I feel that I’ve done as much as I could to achieve that in 2018 and my goal in 2019 remains the same. Having this power to make another person smile, to make ourselves smile, to make the collective smile is something that we all have within us. The choice is yours to join me on my mission 🙂

2018

Happiness really is an inside job

You wanted me to go for my dreams.

You pushed me to have faith in myself.

When I doubted myself you reminded me what I’m capable of.

When I felt confused you calmed me down and taught me that life is perfectly fine as it is unfolding in front of my eyes.

You encouraged me to never give up, to get up when I fell and you gave me strength to walk with more confidence.

It’s because of you that I accepted my faults and learnt to face my fears.

You were the one who showed me strength by being vulnerable.

You made me realise who I really am with masks off. You helped me love the unmasked person.

When I felt that my world had been shattered into a thousand pieces, you were there to pick them up piece by piece.

You: my true and authentic self who has always been there to guide me.

 

Happiness really comes from within. Listening to our gut feeling, inner voice or whatever you want to call it. Shredding away the false layers of myself lead me to a state to realise this.

Trust your own vision, your own message and give yourself some genuine love. Life will do the rest.

Random encounters to inspire us

I mentioned this before that being able to inspire another human being is what keeps me all fuelled up (read more about it here). However we all need to be inspired by others as well especially on days when perhaps it takes greater effort to stay positive and motivated. We all have our own down days / dark days / low days whatever you prefer to call them, and all it matters is how you pull yourself through them. It’s ok to feel this way every now and then and what I learnt is to not beat myself up for feeling this way occasionally. They say, a rainbow comes after a storm and it’s time to accept that sometimes we need to go through that storm.

The difference is though how we go through it: do we make a conscious decision that ‘ok I need this right now to learn and develop’ or do we just let it drag us down? It only depends on your attitude, nobody else’s. And the funniest thing is if you choose the first option then somehow you’ll always end up with some guidance, you just need to trust your gut instinct and pay attention to what’s really happening around you.

Inspiration can come in many forms. Either you read about someone who seems to have their shit together (excuse my language) or it seems to be a random encounter. I had one of these ‘random’ encounters with Mateo Melichar, founder of Fit Budd. Against all odds we met, had a meaningful conversation that lead to a friendship where we constantly motivate and inspire each other. Because we’re not in each others’ daily lives we can genuinely give each other more unbiased advice. We see things from the outside point of view which is exactly what is needed to be able to give a kick in the butt and make us reflect on our own actions and visions.

I encourage you to find such a connection, a mentorship, a friendship, whatever you want to call it. Get yourself surrounded with people who inspire you and you can inspire to. It’s fantastic to have your close circle of your own support system and if you can add at least one person to that who will be able to give you some ‘no bullshit’ advice then do it.

From my personal experience all I can say that this kind of connection is priceless. Pushing each other to achieve our greatest potential is a gift that I never knew I needed. Find that friend, that honest voice, that consultant, that inspiration.

So here I am, digging (Wrinkles of happiness)

21.02.2018

I simply love that feeling when I know I inspired someone. It’s been like this for a few years now but never really decided to dig deep and find out the reason why I enjoy this. I’m in a phase right now when I question everything. I believe that this is a good state to be to learn and develop. Understanding not only our actions but our emotional reactions is key to become a slightly bit better than who we were yesterday. So here I am, digging.

What is that trigger buried deep within my soul that makes me want to see other people smile, to charge up, to be full of life? Why does it make me feel like that I’m full of energy when I achieve to have someone else buzz like how I usually do? I want to see people taking on their everyday life like how the character Tigger does. It’s a strange comparison, I know, but for some reason that’s the character I resonate with the most. Bouncing around with joy and excitement for life.

Enjoying the smallest things and being able to fully appreciate the so-called common things in life.

Yes, I can be completely amazed by the sight of a clear starry sky or seeing someone sing to themselves at the airport while we are being delayed. Seeing a puppy jumping around their owner with unconditional love. An old couple being silent next to each other with wrinkles of happiness across their faces. Getting a cup of coffee served with a genuine smile. Seeing a line of trees along the main road. Admiring the curved up trunk of a tree growing out of concrete. The setting Sun colouring in the playful clouds in orange.

These little things that we walk past every day… This is what makes life a wonderful experience. And most of these things happen naturally. We just don’t always notice them.

I’m not needed to help the tree make its way out of concrete. I didn’t cause that orange shade on the clouds. But! I could contribute towards the wrinkles on someone else’s face. To make sure that they are happy wrinkles. If I can do that, if I have the power to do that, then I will. That’s what we have control over: to make this journey a joyful one.