I’m trying to decide whether to go with a deep, philosophical angle here or pure emotions. My intuition whispers to me softly to choose feelings right now. Those little fractions of our souls, that spark up our days. Or dim them.
“Dim them” – as this rolls off my lips, it has that low frequency feeling to it. Especially when you say it slowly. Dim. Them. Kind of like those sound effects in movies when something drastically is about to happen.
OK, so this is why my intuition gently shoved me towards emotions. To start deeply feeling my words. When you’re a communicator and words are your ammunition, you have a major responsibility to carry. How you put things into perspective can create a spark or a dimming motion.
When you form sentences, you are playing with light. The choice is always there to use language for darkening or lightening up your surroundings. Language is a pulsating burst of energy. It can heal or destroy. And the impact of that energy relies on a 2-fold system:
how the speaker decides to use it
how the listener decides to intercept it
But let’s roll back to emotions for a second before my philosophical mind completely takes over.
Words can make you feel things on levels that you didn’t even know existed. You don’t understand why you feel suddenly so energised and joyous when someone tells you how much they appreciate your efforts. You also wonder when the heavy emotions start swirling around in you when you hear the disappointment in your loved one’s voice.
This is why it’s important to choose your words carefully. Not only do they have an emotional impact on others around you but they also influence how you feel after they swoosh out of your mouth.
Remember, you are playing with light when you think, speak and write. What will you choose to become next time? The lighthouse or the darkness that surrounds it?
Are you also a lightworker ready to make a positive impact?
You’re not alone. There are many of us out there following our internal calling to help humanity evolve and to make our world a better place. Join this revolution and turn your calling into a fulfilling career.
I have some peak periods when I invest more time into connecting to my higher self and tapping into our collective source. These experiences are often overwhelming and they usually result in an information overload. During one of these peak periods in early 2020, I received the following information. It took me over a year to be ready to share it and release it to the public. Curious to hear your intuitive thoughts on this, so here it goes.
Earth is a filter, a purification system to cleanse energy. A portal. There are many other places within the Universe that has similar functions. Earth is like the third eye / ajna chakra of the Universe this is why it is so important that we look after her otherwise it creates a shift within the Galactic balance.
Energy is sent to Earth from the cosmic/collective consciousness / oneness. From the source that keeps our Universe in a constant spinning motion (like a perpetual toy). Purified energy leaves Earth which contributes to the healthy maintenance of collective consciousness. To keep it as pure as possible. Similar to a water filter system. Energy is sent here in a condensed format (solid matter = human bodies, animals, plants, rivers, oceans, mountains etc).
Within each cycle, this energy becomes clarified, cleansed, improved, strengthened, “polished up”, brightened, lightened, purified. The intensity of the purification varies depending on the originating source of the energy that was sent here, the size of that “ball” of energy, the colour/shade of the light.
From a human perspective, our life experiences and life lessons are the tools to purify and cleanse this energy.
For some people this process is more intense depending on the type of energy they carry within themselves. If for example, a human body is “loaded” with a larger amount of brighter type of energy then the purification will be more intense as the energy will endure that level of intensity. This translates to challenging or eventful physical lives, experiences, most likely a stronger connection to higher consciousness, to spirituality, philosophy and science. The truth lies within the mixture of wisdom.
Mathematical, artistic, philosophic and biologic elements meet within the concept of spirituality. Perfectly orchestrated events are pure mathematics, formulas and repeating patters / cycles. We need a sense of spirituality however to recognise these patterns and we need an understanding of science and philosophy to put it into perspective. An artistic approach is required to be able to feel and connect with our own energy and the source of energy. Art is a reminder of our true form: energy. Art is also needed to be able to interpret symbolism that is surrounding us, constantly pointing us to see the forgotten truth. These symbols can be remembered/re-learned through evaluating poetry, through musical notes, colours and patterns in paintings, through the power of words and expression of the self through different personas.
There are 5 pillars to understand and to remember:
The creative arts are the key to connect to ourselves.
Science is the tool to understand patterns, cycles and the importance of numbers
Philosophy is a constant reminder for us that we need to seek answers
Biology is essential to understand the concept of how the condensed energy can function: within our physical bodies and in nature
Spirituality is the vehicle to drive home the truth. Through spiritual awakening will we start looking for more answers, craving experiences that cannot be explained by the rational mind that is responsible for maintaining the biological vehicle.
This was the heavy download I received over a year ago and reading it back now, it makes more sense to me than it initially. I would love to hear your own experiences and your own ‘downloads’ as well, feel free to share them with me.
“As long as your mind is free, your spirit is strong.”
This was the sentence that made my mind shift back into positivity during these strange times we are experiencing globally right now. This simple yet powerful advice came from someone who spent a substantial amount of time in confinement, most of it in a maximum security prison.
I asked him to share his experience in light of our current situation and by sharing some of his story, maybe we can find some answers how to cope. He also reminds us that even though we are quarantined we still have small liberties; we have technology and the internet to entertain ourselves, to keep our minds occupied and to stay connected to our loved ones.
We might be physically confined but the most important thing is: not to be confined mentally. Having some of our freedom suddenly being taken away from us can definitely take its toll on our mental health. I wondered how this compares to being incarcerated?
DOES THIS COVID-19 LOCK DOWN HAVE SIMILAR EFFECTS ON OUR MENTAL HEALTH AS BEING LOCKED UP?
I decided to ask this from someone, let’s call him Diego, who had spent a significant amount of time in confinement, majority of it being in a maximum security prison. Since he finished his sentence, he started a new life and left his old ways behind him to appreciate the second chance that life threw him.
I was curious to find out two things:
What advice can he give to people during these times to keep our mind strong and healthy?
What is that one thing he learnt to appreciate when he got his freedom back?
First thing that became very quickly clear to me was that no, our current lock down is not even half as bad as being completely deprived from all the important things in life: speaking to our loved ones, having our meals when we want to, being able to go for that walk to the supermarket whenever we need to. Being able to open our front door when we feel like, that freedom of movement we still have to take care of our essential needs.
As Diego explains, most people have never been confined of their freedom so it’s a lot harder to deal with it as compared to someone who has been conditioned from a young age and became prepared for it mentally. Also someone who is more of a social, extrovert character, who needs regular social interaction in life, can find this situation even more challenging than how it really is. So as a side note, think about those people in your lives who are extroverts and maybe give them a call a few times in these coming weeks.
It was interesting to hear some of Diego’s tips on how he kept his mind sane while also improving on his own self-development during his time in confinement. For us, during our quarantines these tips and advice can come in useful especially if you feel like that your mental state and emotions are already going through a roller coaster. For me personally, it definitely has been the case and I’m only on my 10th (or 11th?) day of our lock down here in Barcelona.
You will need to train yourself to have some self-discipline.
Introducing a new routine, a new schedule will give you some certainty during these uncertain times. It creates a structure in your mind.
To stay mentally strong:
“I practised a lot of discipline, I meditated, I worked out. You have to make a schedule right around your circumstances. What you create is a program, you’re programming yourself.”
“I used to be a very disciplined individual to withstand and outlast my conditions of confinement. I read a lot and the books that I read were the tools for me to be able to withstand anything mentally.”
How your mindset effects your physical health:
“Of course, none of us like to be confined but it’s either you remain strong mentally or you don’t but then you break mentally. And then you end up having all these other mental handicaps that could probably lead you to your demise. Anxiety, is one of the main ones and from anxiety you will build panic attacks and from panic attacks it could lead to health conditions.
Once your mental state is broken and your spirit is done then your physical well-being will go after it.”
Learning to appreciate what’s important in life:
“What I appreciate in life is the small things, the joys. Health, freedom, those are the things to me that mean the most. Family, love. Everything else can come and go. Money comes and goes, success comes and goes but as long as you have what you stand on, what you believe in, and at the end of the day you have the ones that you love and then you love yourself, that’s what matters the most.”
“During our last conversation when we met for a coffee, I told you how grateful I am and how I’m not in the pursuit so much of being successful financially. Because I’m so grateful being free. I was disciplined and confined for so long and I even confined myself in a way of restricting myself of pleasure. I would do that purposely to become strong mentally. Like I would fast or would limit myself from being able to eat things like chocolate and stuff like that, that could bring small joys. Because if you don’t have something, you don’t want something then you don’t miss it”
I wondered by facing all these restrictions to our freedom through this lock down, has triggered any past traumas for him. Has it brought back some of those negatives memories, emotions or flashbacks?
“So far, I’m dealing with it quite well, it hasn’t triggered anything but then again I’ve been out of that situation for quite a long time. And I understand that this is for my own well-being and for humanity as well. Being a caring person, I don’t want to put other people at risk or myself at risk so you know, I have to be a law abiding citizen.”
If someone who had spent a tremendous amount of time being locked up in prison can understand how important it is to stay at home and complies with the lock down rules, then so can you. You really have no excuse.
Passionate motivator on a mission to help people turn their spiritual calling into their careers. Currently living in Barcelona after having called the following countries here home: Hungary, UK, Malta and Sri Lanka. Brainfused is her platform to translate some of her deep rooted thoughts into the shape of words.
How ironic is that we feel more connected to humanity by being isolated from one another? The little things in life that we took for granted now really teach us their true value. A walk along the beach or in the park, the hugs from your loved ones living abroad, the excitement of planning a weekend getaway. It never crossed our minds that these could be luxuries.
It’s only been 7 days for me since I’ve been in complete lock down and the first few days were actually a bliss like for so many of you as well probably. We could enjoy a bit of calmness in the madness, especially if we live in a city that usually would be bursting with life. For me, that’s Barcelona. But all we see now is empty streets and we started to recognise some familiar faces on the balconies across the street from us. We started waving over to those people during our morning coffees or throwing them a smile while another neighbour is entertaining us with some music to keep our spirits up. Or when we are clapping in unison at 20:00 sharp every evening to show our gratitude to all the incredible people working around the clock in health care, trying their best to safe as many lives as possible.
But as soon as we retreat from our balconies or windows, we are left with our own realities. Either you are sharing your 24 hours inside those walls with your family or living completely alone, it does take a toll on your mental state. It stirs your soul up. It makes you question everything in your life, all of your priorities, all of your time you have been dedicating to something.
Does any of that truly matter? What are those moments that now you realise that you honestly cherish? What are those little life-snippets that make you feel that are creating some kind of value, some kind of meaning?
You start reaching out to people you haven’t talked to for a while, you start reading those books that have been collecting dust on the shelves, you start opening that expensive bottle of wine you’ve been saving up for a special occasion. You suddenly start expressing gratitude to those people that connected with you and showed you something positive, that taught you something meaningful, that stood by you during your darkest days.
This global quarantine is no longer about just putting people into isolation who might be infected with this coronavirus / COVID-19 whatever you want to call it. We are creating a whole different meaning to that state, what this quarantine really means and what it brings out of us.
I see the light and positivity in all this devastating times. I see people reconnecting with themselves, I see people telling their close ones how much they love them, I see people being more compassionate, more helpful, more humane. I see people trying their best to form communities, to strengthen their existing tribes, to care for each other. We needed to be isolated, quarantined to feel more connected than ever before. That’s the biggest quarantine irony and it is the best way to experience this together. Not in fear, not in worrying and not panicking. But by being there for each other, keep lifting each other up, shining a bit of happiness in others’ lives whenever we can.
I encourage all of you to use this strange time to become more connected. We are in this together and remember, this is temporary. It will pass and once we are on the other side, we will have a much different community, society and overall system. We will rebuild our economies together but most importantly we will rebuild ourselves together. We are all one. This is the time to really put that into practice.
So keep smiling at your neighbours, keep entertaining people around you, keep that light shining.
I’m on a mission to build a community, to help people who are working within the spiritual, esoteric and holistic industries reach their potential by truly focusing on their spiritual calling and turning that into their vocation. Learn for free how to start to turn your spiritual mission into your career.
Time was not supposed to go this way Behind the veil you know that it’s astray Those countless times, could you really ever count them? Twice the pleasure but how many times the truth: 8-9 or 10? When you grasp the reality that comes with an expiration date And no matter how much you fight it, you can’t escape your fate
This might feel a bit too dark so maybe I should stop
Stop showing you that you need to embrace the darkness Because without it you can never see the brightness Shining through the black background. That’s how you see the light. Light up my face When you embrace Your hidden parts Are divisions of art. Articulate your desires in life It just might Bring it to surface And you can surf through this.
This whole experience called life Will show you what you’re really about.
So how did we end up here analysing our actions? Starting to feel so deep about the consequences of life’s fractions Maybe we are just too out of this world to explain our feelings And restricted by words to tell everyone the real meaning. I don’t mean to annoy you with my thoughts And there are so many of us Feeling the same way When we say mayday.
Where is the rescue to save us from our visions? To keep us grounded in our ambitious missions?
Time was not supposed to go this way Behind the veil you know that it’s astray We are impatient because we feel the change knocking on our doors And we’re not sure who will fight with us during these upcoming wars.
Sometimes I wonder if he knows the truth about me. His snarky comebacks make me question my ability of keeping my secret hidden. Buried deep within my soul and thoughts. My brother can never find out that I am one of them. For his own sake. It would only be fuel to fire. Brian is already known for his short temper and rebellious attitude. I’m terrified to even imagine what he would do if he knew I am a Hybrid. A voluntary Hybrid actually.
I wanted to make a change, I felt an urge to save our dying, overpopulated planet. When I pressed the ‘send’ button of my application for becoming a Change Leader, I swallowed down my fears. I knew that I can never reveal my true identity. 6 years ago when I volunteered, the ‘1/24’ rule was already in place for a decade which meant all humans of Earth had to carry out at least 1 good deed every 24 hours. Either towards another human or to the environment.
Humanity has long been lost on our overcrowded planet. As a Change Leader my mission is to help bring humanity and humility back while getting rid of the ‘unwanted characters’. Those humans who don’t commit to daily good deeds are not wanted here anymore. There are too many of us and not enough resources and supplies. We simply make sure that people care a bit more. If not then they get sent away from Earth for good. They become the ‘Unwanted’. We do give them 3 chances though before they are removed from this planet but I will tell you about the whole process a little bit later. First let me introduce myself. (I probably should have done this already, excuse my manners).
My name is Liah, a voluntary Hybrid and Change Leader. And this is my story about how I made a big fuck up in the system that caused the first murder committed by a non-human. So much for making a change.
She wanted to run towards her shadow. She wanted to run straight through it, to be able to finally see it behind her. She wanted it so badly that she failed to realise just how absurd this plan was. She ran, she jumped, she crawled, she tip-toed, yet it was always unreachable. Untouchable. It was part of her and wherever she went it was attached to her. The only time she came close to conquer this mystical shadow of herself was in the darkness. No Moonlight, no lamps, no candles just pure blackness. She didn’t see it, wherever she looked. At first, it didn’t matter to her that she saw nothing else either. Yet deep down within herself she knew it was still there, with her. She could feel it.
There’s something you need to know about her.
Not succeeding at getting what she set her mind on was her biggest dislike. Her determination was dangerously dancing across the lines of stubbornness. She truly believed that our limits were meant to be pushed and extended.
So when she couldn’t see her shadow in the darkness, she instinctively wanted to check off this task in her mind as a successful completion. Then in that exact moment the heavy clouds of the night sky suddenly moved along uncovering the bright Moon and all the shadows that came with it. She looked up with a frown on her face and then she saw it. That luminous lonely star slapped onto the black skyline shining its way through the darkness. Who knows how many light years away from her, it was somehow smirking down at her.
There is one more thing you need to know about her.
Just as much she disliked not succeeding, just as much she adored the sparkly stars of the Universe.
She wanted to run away from her own shadow, her own darkness, when she realised it was the same darkness that made it possible for her to see the beauty of the night sky light up. That one star in particular she saw that night.
Looking back on my last few years, even I feel a little surprised how much happened to me. I went through so many experiences and my life changed so often that most people don’t experience this much change in an entire lifetime. While I was in the middle of the process of each situation that was shaping the path of my life, I didn’t realise just how transformational these events were. We need to stop every once in a while to evaluate what we went through and how we improved or what we achieved.
I used to have a tendency to not recognise my own success, to not pat myself on the back occasionally. It didn’t feel right for me to do that. I didn’t want to put myself on the pedestal as I was constantly fighting against my ego and I was consciously trying to dissociate from it, to shatter it into pieces. Once I understood that our ego needs to be understood and managed, not completely destroyed, I realised that I didn’t give myself enough credit. I didn’t know my real worth, I repeatedly ‘undersold’ myself. Knowing your worth and the value you can bring is vital in every area of your life. Be it a job, a relationship or a social commitment, you need to understand where you can position yourself. Not from a superficial point of view as in how others see you and what you portray yourself as but to fully understand where you are standing along your journey. How much knowledge you have, how much value you can add and how you can serve best.
At the end of the day, if you live your life to the full then it’s all about service. That doesn’t mean you need to be in a subordinate role, no not at all. Serving others, serving a community, serving a cause and most importantly serving to fulfil your own desires. These are the things that matter. Either from a business point of view or a personal inspiration, prioritising the service aspect of the process, you will achieve long-lasting results. For example, a business that truly puts customer satisfaction first will thrive within its competition as it will have happy customers who will not only return for more business but will also recommend the service or product happily to others. But hold on for a second, I got a bit side tracked with my story. I wanted to share with you how much happened to me in these past few years, that triggered my need for becoming ‘homeless’ for a while. To have no fixed address and just to go with the flow of life for a while. How I went from having the perfect life (on paper) to living out of a backpack because of that one thought on 4th April 2018. I was a CEO of a start company, I was living in a beautiful 2-bedroom apartment on my own, driving a BMW, ate in restaurants pretty much every day or had my food prepared and delivered to me, had some really good friends yet one day I said I’m not happy and threw my lifestyle away to seek some kind of meaning.
I was looking for some sort of revelation, a lesson, the ultimate purpose.
I was not happy with the ‘successful’ life that so many people only dream about. I had it all laid out in front of me yet it was not enough for some reason. It was lacking a mission, a purpose: what do I leave behind? What do I contribute? How do I inspire? How am I making this world a little bit better? My mind and soul were seeking answers, searching for something. Even I wasn’t sure what it was I was seeking. I just knew I had to change. I wanted to go into the opposite direction and start looking for something that I didn’t know what it was.
I’m struggling to match my thoughts with my emotions. It seems that the past few months of this whirlwind event-chain has now calmed down and it’s trying to find a place to rest. And that place is seeking a title, a name, a short description. I don’t know which shelf to put it on, it needs a whole new cupboard, a whole new room actually. These past 8 months have been incredibly life shaping for me. Especially the second half of this period was what drove me forward before it broke me down and shattered me to pieces. I needed to hit ground zero to realise what it is that I truly wanted in life. I got exactly what I asked for and what I wanted to experience. Yet when I think back I’m struggling to accurately express what I just went through emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
I ran away from success to be in uncertainty and ended up living in the middle of the jungle in Sri Lanka with a man who used to serve in the French legion and woke up each morning to the sound of monkeys jumping on our roof.
Bizarre. This word doesn’t even come close to describing those months. Did I have an amazing experience? For sure. Was I really happy? Definitely not. It was a time of transformation and inner work. Real self-development doesn’t come with smiling faces and constant bliss. It means digging deep within yourself, finding your hidden fears and your buried ‘whys’ for your emotional reactions. And when you find them, you have the choice to either look them in the eye and go straight into those fears or you can find another excuse to quietly cover them up with something else to keep peace. You can easily guess which option I chose. So I shattered myself in the middle of the jungle. Looking back, I believe it was a good environment to carry out this exercise, even though it didn’t always feel that way. Whilst there, I felt that I disconnected from myself, that I lost my way somehow while all I wanted to do was to find my real path. Oh, the irony. Life truly has a great sense of humour.
8 months of searching and realigning. Once my mind had an ‘upgrade’ it only took me 1 week to shift gears and change directions. I knew it was the start of a new chapter which meant closing down old patterns and making space for new beginnings. I re-evaluated my principles and priorities. I came up with new goals and visions, but most of all I felt that I came back to myself as an improved version of me.
So even though I’m still struggling to match my thoughts with my emotions I’m certain that this is the aftermath of this significant experience I just went through. Just as the whole journey didn’t make sense while I was experiencing it and the full picture cleared out once I closed down the chapter, it is very likely that my current emotional state will make sense to me a little bit later. And with that thought I put my mind at rest and will stop thinking about what I could call this.
**********
This is a snippet from my upcoming book: All roads lead to Ohm. I aim to inspire others by sharing not only my eventful stories but life experiences of real characters whom agreed to share the raw, unedited truth.
It was not a game we played, yet I feel like I lost
When we rolled the dice
We realised
What we wanted the most
Was what we have lost
The effect came afterwards of course
We didn’t think it through, I suppose
But it’s too late now to undo this
As my lips shiver for just one more kiss
How I imagine your fingers dig into my neck
There’s no way we can ever go back
The frequency of your voice Sends me into a shock My body vibrates Blood pressure on high rates Muscles tighten up Your palm becomes a cup Holding body parts It’s sexual art
A whiff of your scent sets fire to my nerves
And the desire to feel your body on me burns
It burns through my rational thoughts and judgement
You breath in, I breathe out, no need for adjustment
Time eventually ceases
Our connection increases
I exhale the sweet sounds of joy
You watch me elevate and shake, enjoy!
The frequency of your voice Sends me into a shock My body vibrates Blood pressure on high rates Muscles tighten up Your palm becomes a cup Holding body parts It’s sexual art
Just when I think I can’t take it anymore
You pull me closer into you, encore
But the best part is not the multiple joy
Not even the fact that I completely lost control
But it’s the truth that we united and became one
Without you in my life I’m absolutely undone.
brainfused 